From self-doubt to confidence and executive presence: Insights from my coaching experience

Confidence or Executive Presence isn’t the starting point, it’s the outcome of intentional reflection, action and support

Introduction

Stepping into a new leadership role—or aspiring to a higher one—often brings with it a silent companion: self-doubt. As executive coaches, we frequently meet high-potential individuals paralyzed not by a lack of capability, but by fear. Fear of being “found out,” of not being good enough, or of overreaching. In this blog I share the insights I gained from coaching several clients who struggled with confidence and how they broke through their limiting beliefs to thrive as leaders.

1. The Common Thread: “Am I Really Ready?”

Many of our clients, especially those newly promoted or transitioning industries, carried a quiet insecurity. Despite their qualifications and external endorsements, they questioned their readiness. This internal narrative often sounded like:

• “What if I fail?”

• “Everyone else seems smarter.”

• “I don’t think I’m cut out for this level.”

These doubts weren't rooted in reality but in internalized pressure and perfectionism.

2. Coaching the Inner Narrative

The first breakthrough often came when clients began to identify their “inner critic.” Through reflective exercises, journaling, and dialogue, they learned to recognize the voice of fear—usually shaped by past experiences or unrealistic expectations.We used tools like:

• Strengths assessments to re-anchor them in their capabilities.

• Visualization techniques to imagine success in their new role.

• Reframing exercises to turn fear into fuel.

One client, for example, shifted her narrative from “I’m not ready for this VP role” to “This role is a natural evolution of what I’ve already been doing.”

3. The Power of Small Wins

Confidence is rarely built overnight. A powerful tactic was designing early wins—manageable, visible actions that reinforced belief. For instance:

• Leading a high-stakes presentation.

• Negotiating a challenging stakeholder issue.

• Mentoring someone more junior to solidify their own expertise.

Each success chipped away at the fear and reinforced that they did, indeed, belong.

4. Daring to Dream Bigger

Some clients didn’t just lack confidence in their current role—they couldn’t imagine themselves in bigger roles. They had internal ceilings: “People like me don’t become SVPs,” or “I’m not political enough for the C-suite.”Coaching here focused on:

• Values alignment—understanding that ambition isn’t arrogance, it’s service.

• Exposure to role models—connecting with mentors or peers who had walked similar paths.

• Creating bold visions—not just for their career, but for the impact they wanted to make.

Once the “why” became clear, the “how” became less daunting.

5. Leading with Authenticity, Not Imitation

A surprising insight for many clients was that they didn’t need to “act like” someone else to succeed. They learned to lead as themselves. Coaching focused on:

• Embracing their unique style rather than mimicking traditional leaders.

• Building executive presence through clarity, not charisma alone.

• Leveraging emotional intelligence as a strength, not a liability.

Conclusion: Confidence is Built, Not Bestowed

These coaching journeys reinforced a key truth: confidence isn’t the starting point, it’s the outcome of intentional reflection, action, and support. Every leader faces fear. The ones who grow through it learn to see fear not as a stop sign, but as a signal from your consciousness that growth could result if you handle it.

The call to Action: If you’re holding back from dreaming bigger or fully owning your current role, or in feeling absolutely confident, remember: the voice of doubt isn’t the truth—it’s just noise. And you’re not alone on the journey. Would you like to talk further to get coached on overcoming fear or becoming more confident or developing your executive presence? Taken the first step. Book a free Discovery call with me, from my website at www.SuccessSupport.ca

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